ʻELETĀ W. DOUGLAS SHUMWAY
ʻO e Kau Fitungofulú
Ko hotau fatongia ia ke tau fakaʻapaʻapaʻi ʻa ʻetau nofo-malí, lehilehiʻi ʻetau fānaú, pea fakamālohia hotau ngaahi fāmilí, ʻi ha sosaieti ʻoku lahi ai e fakamamaʻo mei he nofo malí mo e taʻe fie hoko ko ha mātuʻá, pea holoa ai e ngaahi fāmilí.
Naʻá ku nofo hifo mo hoku ngaahi tokoua ʻe toko tolú ʻi he ʻōfisi ʻo ʻemau tamaí ke fai ʻemau fakataha fakapisinisi hili pē ha taimi nounou mei heʻeku malí. ʻI he teu ke mau mavahe he ʻosi ʻemau fakatahá, naʻe tuʻu ʻemau tamaí, tafoki mo pehē mai kiate kimautolu: “Kau tangata, ʻoku ʻikai tama ke mou ngaahi leleiʻi homou ngaahi uaifí ʻo hangē ko ia ʻoku totonu ke mou faí. ʻOku fie maʻu ke mou fakahā kiate kinautolu ha angalelei mo ha fakaʻapaʻapa ʻoku toe lahi angé.” Naʻe fuʻu ongo ʻaupito ki hoku lotó ʻa e ngaahi lea ʻa ʻeku tamaí.
ʻI he ʻaho ní, ʻoku tau mamata tonu ai ki hono ʻohofi taʻe tuku ʻo e nofo malí pea mo e fāmilí. Hangē kuó na hoko kinaua ko e ongo tefitoʻi meʻa ʻuluaki ʻoku tāketiʻi atu ʻe he tēvoló ke fai hono fakamaʻamaʻaʻi pea mo hono fakaʻauhá. Ko hotau fatongia ia ke tau fakaʻapaʻapaʻi ʻa ʻetau nofo-malí, lehilehiʻi ʻetau fānaú, pea fakamālohia hotau ngaahi fāmilí, ʻi ha sosaieti ʻoku lahi ai e fakamamaʻo mei he nofo malí mo e taʻe fie hoko ko ha mātuʻá, pea hōloa ai e ngaahi fāmilí.
Ko hono fakaʻapaʻapaʻi ʻo e nofo malí ʻoku fie maʻu ai ke feʻofaʻaki, fefakaʻapaʻapaʻaki, pea mo fetauhiʻaki ʻa e ongo meʻa malí. Kuo tuku mai ha fakahinohino toputapu kiate kitautolu ke “ke ʻofa ki ho malí ʻaki ho lotó kotoa . . . pikitai kiate ia kae ʻikai ki ha toe taha kehe” (T&F 42:22).
Naʻe akonaki ʻa e palōfita ko Malakaí ʻo pehē, “Koeʻuhi ko e fakamoʻoni ʻa e [ʻEikí] kiate koe pea mo e ʻunoho ʻo hoʻo kei talavoú, ʻa ia kuó ke fai kākā ki aí: ka ko e moʻoni ko hoʻo kaumeʻa ia, pea ko e ʻunoho ne ke fuakava ki ai. . . . Ko ia ke mou tokanga. . . . pea ʻoua naʻa fai kākā ʻe ha taha ki he ʻunoho ʻo ʻene kei talavoú” (Malakai 2:14–15). Ko e moʻoni ko ha monū ia ke tau nofo ʻo moʻui fakataha mo e uaifi ʻo ʻetau kei talavoú, ʻo tauhi e ngaahi fuakavá, maʻu ʻa e potó, pea ʻinasi fakataha mo ia ʻi he ʻofa he taimí ni pea ʻi he taʻengatá kotoa.
ʻOku ou manatu ai ki he lea ʻoku pehē, “ʻOku ʻi ai ʻa e ʻofá ʻi he taimi ko ia ʻoku lahi tatau ai pē ʻa hoʻo tokanga ki he fiefia pe ko e nofo malu ʻa e tokotaha kehé mo hoʻo tokanga ko ia ki hoʻo fiefia pea mo hoʻo nofo malu ʻaʻaú” (Harry Stack Sullivan, Conceptions of Modern Psychiatry, [1940] 42–43).
ʻOku fakataumuʻa ʻa e nofo malí pea kuo pau pē ke hoko ia ko ha fetuʻutaki ʻoku fakahoko ʻi he ʻofa, ʻi he fāitaha, pea mo e fekoekoeʻi ʻi he vā ʻo ha tangata mo ha fefine. Ko e taimi ko ia ʻoku mahino ai ki ha husepāniti mo ha uaifi ko e fāmilí ʻoku tuʻutuʻuni ia ʻe he ʻOtuá pea ʻe lava pē ke fakafonu ʻaki ʻa e nofo mali ko iá ʻa e ngaahi talaʻofa pea mo e ngaahi tāpuaki ʻe hoko atu ʻo aʻu ki he taʻengatá, ʻe tātātaha leva ke ʻi ai ha taimi ia ʻe fakakaukauʻi ai ha māvae mo ha vete mali ʻi he ʻapi ʻo ha kāingalotu ʻo e Siasí. ʻE mahino ki he ngaahi hoa malí ʻoku ʻomi ʻe he ngaahi ouau toputapu mo e ngaahi fuakava ko ia ʻoku fakahoko ʻi he Fale ʻo e ʻEikí ʻa e ngaahi founga ʻe lava ke nau toe foki hake ai ki he ʻafioʻanga ʻo e ʻOtuá.
Kuo tuku ki he ngaahi mātuʻá ʻa e fatongia toputapu ke nau “tauhi [ʻa e fānaú] ʻi he akonaki . . . [ʻa e] ʻEikí” (ʻEfesō 6:4). “ʻOku fekauʻaki ʻa e fuofua fekau naʻe tuku ʻe he ʻOtuá kia ʻĀtama mo ʻIví ʻi he meʻa te na malava ʻi hona tuʻunga fakamātuʻa ko e husepāniti mo e uaifí” (Ko e Fāmilí– Ko ha Fanongonongo ki Māmani,” Liahona, ʻOkatopa 1998, 24). Ko ia ai, ʻoku ʻikai ngata pē hotau fatongiá ʻi hono tokangaʻi hotau malí, ka ʻoku toe kau foki ai mo ʻetau fānaú, he “ko e fānaú ko e tofiʻa mei [he ʻEikí” (Saame 127:3). Te tau lava ʻo fai ʻa e fili ke ʻohake ʻa ʻetau fānaú ʻo fakatatau ki ai pea “akoʻi [kinautolu] ke lotu, pea ke ʻaʻeva ʻo angatonu ʻi he ʻao ʻo e ʻEikí” (T&F 68:28). ʻI heʻetau hoko ko ia ko e ngaahi mātuʻá, kuo pau ke tau lau ʻa ʻetau fānaú ko ha ngaahi meʻaʻofa kinautolu mei he ʻOtuá, pea kuo pau ke tau loto ke ngaohi hotau ngaahi ʻapí ke hoko ko ha feituʻu ke tau ʻofaʻi, akoʻi, mo lehilehiʻi hake ai ʻa hotau ngaahi fohá mo hotau ngaahi ʻofefiné.
ʻOku fakamanatu mai ʻe Palesiteni Tōmasi S. Monisoni kiate kitautolu, “ʻOku ʻikai ko ha meʻa faingofua ʻa e tuʻunga fakatakí, ka ko ha fatongia ia ʻoku mafatukituki. . . . ʻOku fie maʻu ʻe he toʻu tupú ke toko siʻi ange ʻa e kau fakaangá kae toko lahi ange ʻa e kau tā sīpinga ke nau muimui ki aí. ʻI he taʻu ʻe teau mei he taimí ni ʻe ʻikai ke fuʻu mahuʻinga ia pe ko e hā ʻa e faʻahinga motokā naʻa tau fakaʻuli holo aí, ko e faʻahinga fale fēfē naʻa tau nofo aí, ko e hā e lahi ʻo ʻetau paʻanga ʻi he pangikeé, pe naʻe anga fēfē hotau valá. Ka ʻe toe kiʻi lelei ange ʻa māmani he naʻa tau mahuʻingaʻia ʻi he moʻui ʻa ha kiʻi tamasiʻi pe taʻahine” (Pathways to Perfection, [1973] 131).
Neongo ʻoku faʻa ʻi ai e ngaahi taimi ʻi he moʻuí ʻoku tau helaʻia ai, siʻi e kātakí, pe ko haʻatau fuʻu femoʻuekina ke ʻi ai ha taimi mo ʻetau fānaú, ka kuo pau ke ʻoua ʻaupito naʻa ngalo ʻiate kitautolu ʻa e mahuʻinga taʻefakangatangata ʻo e meʻa ʻoku tau maʻu ʻi hotau ngaahi ʻapí—ʻa hotau ngaahi fohá mo e ngaahi ʻofefiné. ʻOku lelei kotoa pē ʻa e ngaahi meʻa ia ʻoku tau lolotonga fai he taimi ní, ʻa e fakataha fakapisinisi naʻe ʻosi aleaʻi ke faí mo ha meʻalele foʻoú, ka ʻoku ʻikai ofi honau mahuʻingá ʻo nautolu ki he mahuʻinga ʻo e laumālie ʻo ʻetau fānaú, ʻi he taimi ʻoku fakafehoanaki ai kinauá.
Naʻe poupou mai ʻa Sione Kanifā, ko ha tamai ia naʻe mālōlō hono fohá mei he kanisā ʻa hono 'utó, kiate kimoutolu ko ia ʻoku kei maʻu homou “ngaahi fohá mo homou ngaahi ʻofefiné, ke “mou toe fakahaaʻi kiate kinautolu ha ʻofa lahi ange pea mo ha fiefia ʻoku lahi angé” (Death Be Not Proud: A Memoir, [1949], 259).
Naʻe fakamatala ʻa Palesiteni Hāloti B. Lī ʻo kau ki ha tangata ako ʻiloa ko Hōlasi Mani ʻa ia ko e “tokotaha lea ia ʻi hono huufi ʻo ha ʻapiako . . . maʻá e fānau tangatá. ʻI he lea naʻá ne faí naʻá ne pehē ai, ‘Kuo lau mano ʻa e paʻanga naʻe fakamoleki ki he ʻapiakó ni, ka ʻo kapau ʻe lava ʻe he ʻapiakó ni ʻo fakahaofi ha tamasiʻi ʻe toko taha, ʻoku mahuʻinga feʻunga pē ia mo e paʻanga kotoa naʻe fakamoleki ki aí.’ Naʻe haʻu ha taha ʻo hono ngaahi kaungāmeʻá [kia Misa Mani] ʻi he ʻosi ʻa e fakatahaʻangá ʻo ne pehē ange, ʻNaʻá ke fuʻu māfana pē ʻo uesia ai hoʻo fakakaukau leleí, ʻikai ko ia? . . . Naʻá ke pehē koā kapau ʻe lava ʻe he ʻapiakó ni, ʻa ia naʻe lau mano ʻa e fakamole ki aí, ʻo fakahaofi ha tamasiʻi pē ʻe toko taha, ʻoku mahuʻinga feʻunga pē ia mo e paʻanga naʻe fakamoleki ki aí? Pau pē naʻe ʻikai ko hoʻo fakamātoato.’ Naʻe hanga atu ʻa Hōlasi Mani ki ai mo ne pehē ange, ‘ʻIo ʻe hoku kaumeʻa. ʻE feʻunga ʻaupito pē ia kapau ko e tamasiʻi ʻe toko taha ko iá ko hoku foha; ʻe feʻunga pē ia’”(“Todayʻs Young People,” Ensign, June 1971, 61).
ʻOku kau ʻa hono ʻofaʻi, maluʻi, pea mo hono lehilehiʻi ʻo ʻetau fānaú, ʻi he ngaahi meʻa te tau fai ʻa ia ʻoku toputapu mo taʻengata taha honau mahuʻingá. ʻE mole atu ʻa e ngaahi meʻa ʻo e māmaní, ʻe ʻikai toe kau e foʻi heleʻuhila ʻiloa tahá pe foʻi fasi mālie taha ia ʻo e ʻaho ní he laú ʻa pongipongi, ka ʻoku taʻengata ha foha ia pe ha ʻofefine.
“Ko e fāmilí ko e uho ia ʻo e palani ʻa e Fakamoʻuí ki he ikuʻanga taʻengata ʻo ʻEne fānaú” (Ko e Fāmilí: Ko ha Fanongonongo ki Māmani). ʻI heʻene peheé, kuo pau ke ngāue fakataha ʻa e ngaahi mātuʻá ia mo e fānaú ʻi he uouangataha ke fakamālohia ʻa e ngaahi fetuʻutaki fakafāmilí, pea tanumaki ia mei he ʻaho ki he ʻaho.
ʻOku ʻi ai hoku taʻokete naʻe ngāue ʻi ha ʻunivēsiti lahi ʻe taha. Naʻá ne fakamatala kau ki ha tamasiʻi ako ʻatelita naʻe tuʻukimuʻa ʻaupito ʻi he puna hētoló. Naʻe kui ʻa e talavoú ni. Naʻe fehuʻi ange ʻe Leki, “ʻOku ʻikai ke ke tō koe ʻi ha taimi?” Naʻe tali ange ʻe he talavou ʻatelitá, “Kuo pau ke tonu ʻeku fuá. ʻOku ou fua ʻa e taimi taki taha ʻoku ou puna aí. Naʻe ʻi ai e taimi ʻe taha naʻe ʻikai te u fua ai ʻeku puná pea ne u meimei mate ai.” Naʻe toki fakamatala leva ʻa e talavoú ki he ngaahi houa lahi naʻe fakamoleki ʻe heʻene tamaí ʻi he ngaahi taʻu lahi ke akoʻi, tokoniʻi, mo fakahinohino ia ki he anga ʻo e puna hētoló ʻo aʻu ki heʻene hoko ko e taha ʻo e kau puna hētolo lelei tahá.
ʻE lava fēfē leva ke taʻe lavameʻa ʻa e talavoú ni kapau ʻoku kau ki ha timi peheni–ko ha tamai mo hono foha.
Kau talavou mo e kau finemui, te mou lava ʻo hoko ko ha ivi takiekina mahuʻinga ki he leleí ʻi homou ngaahi ʻapí ʻi haʻamou tokoni ke aʻusia ʻa e ngaahi taumuʻa fakafāmili ʻoku taau mo feʻungá. ʻE ʻikai teitei ngalo ʻiate au ʻa e efiafi fakafāmili naʻe fakahoko ʻi he ngaahi taʻu kuohilí ʻa ia naʻe faʻo ai ʻi ha loto tatā ʻa e hingoa ʻo e mēmipa taki taha ʻo homau fāmilí. Naʻe hoko ʻa e hingoa naʻá ke toho mei he tataá ko ho “kaumeʻa fakapulipuli” ki he uike ko iá. Te ke lava pē ke fakakaukau atu ki he ʻofa ko ia naʻe fonu ʻi hoku lotó ʻi heʻeku foki mai mei he ngāué ʻi he ʻaho Tūsite ko ʻení ke tafi ʻa e tauʻanga meʻalelé ʻo hangē ko ia ne u palōmesi te u faí, ʻo ʻilo kuo ʻosi tafi ia ʻo maʻa. Naʻe fakapipiki ha kiʻi tohi ʻi he matapā ʻo e tauʻanga meʻalelé ʻa ia naʻe fakalea ʻo peheni: “Fakatauange pē naʻá ke maʻu ha ʻaho lelei—mei ho kaumeʻa fakapulipulí.” Pea ʻi he pō Falaité, ʻi heʻeku ueʻi hifo e tupenu ʻufiʻufi mohengá kau tokotó, naʻá ku maʻu ai ha foʻi lole sokoleti, ʻa e kalasi ʻoku ou saiʻia taha aí, kuo osi kofukofu fakalelei ʻaki ʻa e pepa hinehina pea tepiʻi, pea ʻi ai mo e kiʻi tohi naʻe fakalea peheni: “Tangataʻeiki, ʻoku ou ʻofa lahi ʻiate koe!—mālō, ko ho kaumeʻa fakapulipulí.” Pea ko e meʻa fakaʻosi mo lelei tahá ko ʻeku foki mai ki ʻapi mei ha fakataha lōloa naʻe fai ʻi he efiafi Sāpaté ʻo u sio kuo ʻosi seti fakaʻofoʻofa ʻa e tēpile kaí, pea naʻe tohiʻi matalalahi ʻi he meʻa holoholo ʻi hoku tangutuʻangá ʻa e ngaahi foʻi lea ko ʻení, “TAMAI TUʻUKIMUʻA TAHÁ” pea haʻi he tafaʻakí “ko ho kaumeʻa fakapulipulí.” Fai hoʻomou ngaahi efiafi fakafāmili ʻi ʻapí, he ko e feituʻu ʻeni ʻoku akoʻi ai ʻa e ongoongoleleí, maʻu ai mo e fakamoʻoní, pea fakamālohia ai ʻa e fāmilí.
Neongo ʻa e feinga ʻa e filí ke fakaʻauha ʻa e ngaahi tefitoʻi meʻa mahuʻinga ʻoku fie maʻu ki ha nofo mali ʻoku fiefia pea mo ha fāmili ʻoku anga māʻoniʻoní, ka te u tala fakapapau atu ʻoku lava ʻe he ongoongolelei ʻo Sīsū Kalaisí ke ʻomai ʻa e ngaahi meʻangāue pea mo e ngaahi akonaki ʻoku fie maʻu ke tauʻiʻaki pea ikunaʻiʻaki ʻa e filí ʻi he feinga tau ko ʻení. Kapau pē te tau fakaʻapaʻapaʻi ʻa ʻetau ngaahi nofo malí ʻaki ʻa ʻetau ʻoange ha ʻofa mo ha loto taʻe siokita ʻoku lahi angé ki hotau ngaahi malí; tauhi mo lehilehiʻi ʻa ʻetau fānaú ʻo fakafou ʻi he feifeingaʻi ʻi he angavaivai pea mo e faiako lelei tahá, ʻa ia ko ʻetau faʻifaʻitakiʻangá; pea tau fakamālohia ʻa e tuʻunga fakalaumālie ʻo hotau ngaahi fāmilí ʻaki hono fai maʻu pē ʻo e efiafi fakafāmili ʻi ʻapí, lotú mo e ako folofolá. ʻOku ou fakamoʻoni atu kiate kimoutolu ʻe fakahinohinoʻi kitautolu ʻe he Fakamoʻuí ʻa ia ʻokú Ne moʻui, ko Sīsū Kalaisi, pea te Ne tuku ke tau ikunaʻi ʻa e ngaahi ngāue ʻoku tau faí ke tau aʻusia ai ha fāmili ʻoku taʻengatá. ʻI he huafa ʻo Sīsū Kalaisí, ʻēmeni
Previous
