Teaching about Procreation and Chastity God expects parents in the Church to teach their children about procreation and chastity and to prepare them for dating and marriage. This responsibility should not be left to schools, friends, playmates, or strangers. Heavenly Father wishes his children to understand how to use this great and holy power wisely and reverently. If parents will seek the guidance of the Spirit in humble prayer, he will help them teach their children about this sacred power. Elder Mark E. Petersen explained: "Sex education belongs in the home, where parents can teach chastity in a spiritual environment as they reveal the facts of life to their children. There, in all plainness, the youngsters can be taught that procreation is part of the creative work of God and that, therefore, the act of replenishing the earth must be kept on the high plane of personal purity that God provides, free from all form of perversion. "Unskilled parents can learn to teach their children properly. In fact, God commands it, and who are we to disobey?" (In Conference Report, Apr. 1969, p. 64; or Improvement Era, June 1969, p.78). Responding to Your Children's Questions When a very young child asks a question, a simple matter-of-fact answer will usually satisfy him. For instance, consider the following: " 'Mommy, where do babies come from?' Alan asked. " 'Alan, where do you think babies come from?' his mother replied. " 'I think,' Alan said, 'they come from hospitals.' " 'I can understand how you might think that,' his mother explained, 'but let me tell you how Heavenly Father planned for his spirit children to come to earth. There is a special warm place inside Mommy called a womb, where babies grow until they are ready to be born. Then Mommy goes to the hospital and the doctor helps bring the baby from the womb to the outside.' "Answers to questions should be geared to the age and level of understanding of the child. If an older child would like more detailed information about childbirth, the mother might say, 'Babies pass to the outside through a channel called the vagina. This channel is not the same as [the one you use when you go to the bathroom].' "At a young age the child has no desire to have additional details. If a child holds out his small cup of inquiry, we should not try to pour an ocean of explanation into it. Generally, he will be content with an accurate but simple answer. "Teenagers who might ask more detailed questions should also receive frank and accurate answers. In response to questions about physical intimacies, emphasis should be placed on the fact that when husbands and wives share intimate moments, they are expressing their love for each other. Their actions are sanctioned because they have taken marriage vows, but such intimacies are not sanctioned by the Lord outside of marriage." (Relief Society Courses of Study, 1979–80, p. 110.) How we react as our young children display curiosity about their bodies also helps them form attitudes. "A child quite naturally touches his ears, nose, genitals, and other parts as a learning experience. When different feelings occur a child may touch again. Harsh words and punishments are unwise. It's more helpful to say, 'It is better not to do this,' and then give the youngster something else to do." (Relief Society Courses of Study, 1972–73, p. 199.) If children do not ask questions, parents should plan some means of approaching their preteen sons and daughters. This approach should emphasize the eternal plan of a loving Father in Heaven, a plan that enables us to have eternal families. Teaching Your Children Before Puberty As children approach puberty, the time when a person physically becomes capable of being a parent, they should be prepared for the bodily changes that will occur. Parents should tell their children before their bodies change that these changes are normal. Children need to understand that their bodies are simply preparing to fulfill the roles Heavenly Father intended them to have. Parents should also explain that each person develops at his own rate of speed, some faster than others, some a little slower. Girls should be taught about menstruation–the body's discharged flow of blood and tissue from the uterus when an ovum has been produced but not fertilized. After puberty this period occurs approximately every twenty-eight days; however, irregularity in duration and timing can occur, especially in the first few months. A boy should be taught about the power of creation within his body and that the Lord intended that this power should be used exclusively in marriage. He should be cautioned against sexual self-stimulation (masturbation). The Church has printed an excellent pamphlet, To Young Men Only (PBAP0210). This pamphlet is a reprint of an address given by Elder Boyd K. Packer in the priesthood session of the October 1976 general conference and can help fathers counsel their sons regarding their growth and physical maturation. Parents should teach youth that although it is normal to feel attracted to the opposite sex, they must keep these feelings under restraint. "Youth need to understand how to interpret these [normal feelings according to their divine purpose]. Young people can counteract worldly attitudes with this attitude: 'This power of procreation is a spark of divinity within me. It is not part of my life now, but will be later. There is a proper time (marriage) for this spark of divinity to find expression with a proper person (my wife or husband). Self-mastery now will help me be capable of a celestial love and a celestial marriage. This is the future I want, and I must strive for it.' " (Relief Society Courses of Study, 1979–80, p. 111.)