Dress and Appearance
Servants of God have always counseled his children to dress modestly
to show respect for him and for themselves. Because the way you dress
sends messages about yourself to others and often influences the way you
and others act, you should dress in such a way as to bring out the best
in yourself and those around you. However, if you wear an immodest bathing
suit because it's "the style," it sends a message that you are
using your body to get attention and approval, and that modesty is not
important.
Immodest clothing includes short shorts, tight pants, and other revealing
attire. Young women should refrain from wearing off-the-shoulder, low-cut,
or revealing clothes. Young men should similarly maintain modesty in their
dress. All should avoid tight fitting or revealing clothes and extremes
in clothing and appearance.
As Latter-day Saint youth, you can also show respect for the Lord and
yourselves by dressing appropriately for Church meetings and activities,
whether on Sunday or during the week. If you are not sure what's appropriate,
ask for guidelines from your parents, advisers, and bishop.
Honesty
Be honest with yourself and others, including the Lord. Honesty with
yourself brings peace and self-respect. When you are honest with others,
you build a foundation for friendship and trust. For example, honesty
with your parents can help to establish a trusting and lasting relationship
with them. Dishonesty hurts you and usually hurts other people as well.
Being honest with the Lord will bring his trust and blessings. Lying
damages your spirit. Stealing or shoplifting does the same thing, as does
cheating in school. The Lord said: "Thou shalt not steal. Thou shalt
not bear false witness" (Exodus 20:15–16). Don't rationalize
that wrong is right. Being honest includes having the courage to do what
you know to be right.
Language
How you speak and the words you use tell much about the image you choose
to portray. Use language to build and uplift those around you. Profane,
vulgar, or crude language and inappropriate or off-color jokes are offensive
to the Lord. They harm your spirit and degrade you. Don't lower yourself
to use such language or jokes, even if people around you do. Never misuse
the name of God or Jesus Christ. The Lord said, "Thou shalt not take
the name of the Lord thy God in vain" (Exodus 20:7). Set a positive
example for your friends and others by using clean language to express
your feelings.
Gossip is another kind of harmful language. When you say something bad
about people who are not present or tell secrets you know about them,
you are
gossiping. Gossip causes hurt and pain for other people. The Lord commands
us to love one another. To follow this commandment, speak kindly and positively
about others.
Sexual Purity
Our Heavenly Father has counseled that sexual intimacy should be reserved
for his children within the bonds of marriage. The physical relationship
between a husband and a wife can be beautiful and sacred. It is ordained
of God for the procreation of children and for the expression of love
within a marriage: "Therefore shall a man leave his father and his
mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh"
(Genesis 2:24).
Because sexual intimacy is so sacred, the Lord requires self-control
and purity before marriage as well as full fidelity after marriage. In
dating, treat your date with respect, and expect your date to show that
same respect to you. Never treat your date as an object to be used for
your own lustful desires or ego. Improper physical contact can cause a
loss of self-control. Always stay in control of yourself and your physical
feelings.
The Lord specifically forbids certain behaviors, including all sexual
relations before marriage, petting, sex perversion (such as homosexuality,
rape, and incest), masturbation, or preoccupation with sex in thought,
speech, or action (see A Parent's Guide, pp. 36–39).
Homosexual and lesbian activities are sinful and an abomination to the
Lord (see Romans 1:26–27, 31). Unnatural affections including those
toward persons of the same gender are counter to God's eternal plan for
his children. You are responsible to make right choices. Whether directed
toward those of the same or opposite gender, lustful feelings and desires
may lead to more serious sins. All Latter-day Saints must learn to control
and discipline themselves.
Victims of rape, incest, or other sexual abuse are not guilty of sin.
If you have been a victim of any of these terrible crimes, be assured
that God still loves you! Your bishop can also help and guide you through
the mental and emotional healing process if you seek his advice and counsel.
Scripture reinforces the foregoing teachings and standards: "This
I say then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfill the lust of the
flesh. For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against
the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot
do the things that ye would. . . . Now the works of the flesh are manifest,
which are these; adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, idolatry,
witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which
I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which
do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God" (Galatians 5:16–17,
19–21).
Sunday Behavior
The Lord has given the Sabbath day for your benefit and has commanded
you to keep it holy. On this sacred, holy day, worship the Lord, strengthen
family relationships, help others, and draw close to the Lord. Your dress
before and after meetings should reflect your respect for the Sabbath.
Many activities are appropriate for the Sabbath; however, it is not a
holiday. You should avoid seeking entertainment or spending money on this
day.
When seeking a job, you may wish to share with your potential employer
your desire to attend your Sunday meetings and keep the Sabbath holy.
Many employers value employees with these personal convictions. Try to
choose a job that doesn't require you to work on Sunday.
Spiritual Help
When you were confirmed a member of the Church, you received the right
to the companionship of the Holy Ghost. He can help you make good choices.
When challenged or tempted, you do not need to feel alone. The Holy Ghost
will help you know right from wrong, "For they that are wise . .
. have taken the Holy Spirit for their guide" (D&C 45:57).
Repentance
Some people knowingly break God's commandments. They plan to repent before
they go on a mission or receive the sacred covenants and ordinances of
the temple. Repentance for such behavior is difficult and painful and
may take a long time. It is better to not commit the sin. Certain sins
are of such gravity that they can put your membership in the Church and
your eternal life at risk. Sexual sins are among those of such seriousness.
Where choices have already led to sexual impurity, repentance is the
way back. Talk to your parents and your bishop. They love you and will
explain to you how to repent and put your life in order again. Follow
their counsel.
The miracle of forgiveness is real, and true repentance is accepted by
the Lord. Full repentance of some sins requires that we not only confess
and resolve them with the Lord but that we also do so with the Church.
The bishop and stake president have been appointed by revelation to serve
as judges in these cases.
Only the Lord can forgive sins, but these priesthood leaders can assist
the transgressor in the process of repentance. In serious cases of transgression,
Church disciplinary action could be required and disfellowshipment or
excommunication could result. These actions are taken only when they are
necessary in the repentance process. If you have sinned, the sooner you
begin to make your way back, the sooner you will find the sweet peace
and joy that come with the miracle of forgiveness.
As you follow these guidelines, you will feel and experience the power
of the Spirit of the Lord, you will come to know the truth, and you will
gain confidence in yourself and the Lord. The Savior taught, "The
truth shall make you free" (John 8:32). As you grow in that truth
and freedom, you will experience the peace of the Lord Jesus Christ, a
peace that brings great strength.
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