Relief Society President's Message Welfare-Free Zone? Look Again March 2004 Open House Bonnie D. Parkin Relief Society General President In July of 1947—before many of you were born—Mae and Henry Matis were called to go to Finland. It was right after World War II and every nation was still reeling from the carnage. Let me share with you their story. Brother Matis writes: “We were living in the university ward in Chicago. Mae was the ward Relief Society president and had committed to the stake Relief Society president that the ward would make six quilts for the general welfare storage department in Salt Lake. “The sisters had made five of the quilts and had run out of material. This was during wartime and everyone was having a hard time making ends meet. Mae asked the stake Relief Society president if the five quilts would be acceptable, but Sister Williams challenged her and the ward to try to make that sixth quilt, which they did out of odds and ends of material. Then, to make it look as nice as possible, Mae took our daughter’s plaid skirt and bound the quilt with it and sent off all six quilts to Welfare Square.” It was two years later, on Mother’s Day of 1947, that President George Albert Smith went to Chicago and asked Brother and Sister Matis if they would accept a call to Finland and open up the mission there. Brother Matis continues: “We packed enough clothing, bedding, and food to sustain us in that war-torn country. On arrival in Helsinki we found that most of our supplies had been stolen during shipment. I sent to Salt Lake for more supplies as we needed clothing and bedding and we felt there might be some in the general welfare storage. When the supplies arrived in Helsinki by boat, we anxiously started to open boxes. On the top of the very first box we opened was that sixth quilt. This assured us that the Lord really did want us to be in Finland.”1 Now sisters, this is not a call to make quilts! It’s a call to recognize the power of the welfare program of the Church. Both the giver and the receiver are blessed by serving the Lord in such righteousness. Welfare is significant because it is the Lord’s work. Welfare is expansive; it is much more than a food order, a canning assignment, or a year’s supply. Extending meaningful welfare service begins with two elements—vision and love. We need to understand our priesthood leaders’ vision of welfare in our corner of the vineyard—a vision we can help shape through established councils. We also need to have a personal love for those we are privileged to serve and an understanding of their individual needs and wants. In preparing this message, I went to the Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, to see the direction we’ve been given on welfare. I received new insight into my duties as the Relief Society general president. I also looked again at what was there for you as stake and ward Relief Society presidencies. I hope you, too, are turning to the handbook for both instruction and inspiration. Listen to the “job description” for my calling: “Under the direction of the First Presidency and Quorum of the Twelve, members of the Relief Society general presidency counsel regularly with priesthood advisers and bring forward matters pertaining to women and families. They also serve on the General Welfare Committee.”2 And by appointment from the First Presidency, we also serve on the Welfare Executive Committee, which is the operational arm of Church welfare. Sisters, with the troubles and challenges that face women and families, please know that our voice in the General Welfare Committee is both heard and appreciated. You know, it’s an interesting triangle—priesthood leaders, Relief Society leaders, and the welfare committee—with the major connection being the “matters pertaining to women and families.”3 As Relief Society leaders, we must be concerned with the welfare—or well-being—of women and families. We must be anxiously engaged in bringing forward their needs to priesthood leaders. How do we do that? Let me give you an example. The Relief Society general presidency and all general auxiliary leaders travel across the world to meet, teach, and listen to Saints everywhere. I like to call this global visiting teaching! After each visit, we meet as a presidency to discuss what we heard and learned about the needs of the Saints in that area. Recently, we realized that auxiliary leaders everywhere were sharing a similar concern—they were not meeting regularly with their priesthood leaders in councils, and they were not receiving training or support in matters of welfare. And so, as my counselors and I met, we not only discussed our concerns, we also prayerfully sought solutions. After counseling together, we were ready to take both our concerns and our recommendations to our priesthood leaders. Ours just happen to be President Hinckley, President Monson, and President Faust. (Somehow that’s just a bit more daunting than when I was a ward Relief Society president!) In our regular meeting with the First Presidency, we shared what we had learned from listening to sisters around the world—that they don’t have a regular time to meet with priesthood leaders, and they desire more training and support in welfare. We asked the Brethren how we could help priesthood leaders understand the importance of training their Relief Society leaders in welfare principles and practices. Of course, we had our suggestions ready, but before we could express them, President Hinckley responded, “Well, sisters, I can address that in the Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting this Saturday.” (Mind you, it was Wednesday!) And, if you saw that broadcast, you know that he did! Listen to what President Hinckley said in that meeting: “To you stake presidents and bishops, we plead with you to give encouragement and help in every possible way to the women and the girls of your stakes and wards. They need your priesthood backing. They need your leadership and counsel. Help them in every way that you can, and while doing so you will help yourselves. “For instance, it is imperative that bishops work closely with Relief Society presidents in administering Church welfare. This is normally accomplished in the monthly ward welfare committee meeting or, on occasion, in the ward council meeting. But emergencies arise, or there may be circumstances where greater confidentiality is required, in which case the bishop and the Relief Society president should consult together. Wherever there is material need in a family, the Relief Society president is best qualified to go into the home and assess the family’s needs.”4 Did you see how this happened? First, we sought out the welfare needs of women and families through personal visits. Next, we discussed as a presidency what we had learned, and prayed for guidance with potential solutions. Then, we met with our priesthood leaders to seek their counsel. Finally, we found a solution, and good things happened. We’ve heard from many of you that these words of our prophet have given new emphasis, insight, and direction to you and your priesthood leaders. Welfare has been central to the gospel from the very early days of the Church. President Harold B. Lee, who was pivotal in shaping the Church welfare program as we know it today, expressed the importance of men and women joining together to address welfare needs when he said: “Priesthood plus womanhood together bring exaltation! Priesthood plus womanhood is necessary in welfare. Without this teamwork, never in the world would we accomplish what we are doing in the welfare program.”5 Stake Relief Society Leaders Let’s put President Lee’s direction to work on a local level. As stake Relief Society leaders, what does the handbook say about your welfare responsibilities? “Members of the stake Relief Society presidency direct the efforts of the stake Relief Society to accomplish the Relief Society's purpose and objectives.”6 After reading this, I went back and studied our Relief Society objectives. The welfare messages jumped out at me. Objective four—“strengthen and protect families”—encourages provident living and wise home management. How are you helping wards meet this objective? Objective five—“serve and support each sister”—is just another way of saying welfare. Listen to some of these words: “Relief Society helps sisters feel needed, included, valued, and loved regardless of their personal circumstances.” Objective three—“exercise charity and nurture those in need.”7 Welfare again. Sisters, as I read and reflected on our objectives, it became clear to me that much of our work in Relief Society is about welfare. I encourage you to study the purpose and objectives of our beloved organization because they, like the scriptures, teach us of eternal truths. There aren’t many places you can go in this world and receive that kind of divine clarity. The more we review and study our objectives, the more we will recognize the strength and direction they give us. Welfare is woven throughout our objectives. In addition to our objectives, stake Relief Society presidents are charged with the responsibility to “serve as a resource to ward Relief Society presidencies,” to “instruct and advise individual presidencies as requested by the ward or directed by the stake presidency,” and to “occasionally visit ward Relief Society meetings and activities to give support and ensure that the organization is functioning properly.”8 How do these assignments address welfare? Let me share with you what one stake Relief Society presidency is doing to be a welfare resource to the 12 wards in their stake. The first Tuesday of each month the stake Relief Society presidency makes visits with a ward Relief Society presidency. Each ward is asked to make appointments with eight less-active sisters or with sisters who have special needs. The stake Relief Society secretary coordinates all of the scheduling. The stake and ward presidencies meet together, have prayer, then divide up with their counterpart. Each pair takes two names, and they visit those sisters together. Listen to the results of these visits. The stake Relief Society president observed: “This experience has given us one-on-one time with our ward counterparts. We recognize and appreciate the importance of making home visits. Because of these home visits, we are more likely to seek out and show love and acceptance to those in need and to our less-active sisters. We are seeing our ward presidencies scheduling more visits because they have seen and felt some success. Some ward presidency members have expressed fear of being out of their comfort zone when making these visits. But after going with her stake counterpart, fears disappeared.”9 Home visits should be a joyful and rewarding part of your calling. There is one more welfare responsibility that I want to mention. As a stake Relief Society presidency you serve on the stake welfare committee. You see—up close and personal—the needs and resources of the stake. Clearly, there is power in meeting and counseling together. Let me give you a snapshot of what’s happening in a stake welfare committee in the Midwest. The stake Relief Society president writes: “Among the Relief Society, welfare is commonly spoken of in terms of reactively providing food and supplies for families in need. Often we are in reactive mode because the crises we handle are so enormous. Because of this, less emphasis is given to proactive employment and emergency preparedness. Health and wellness aren’t immediately thought of by our sisters as being part of welfare. But from a proactive standpoint, as a stake Relief Society presidency, we feel they certainly are and encourage use of Enrichment meetings as the best place to teach welfare skills.”10 Can you relate with these challenges? Have you overlooked health and wellness as important welfare needs? It’s exciting to hear the solutions that came from this stake welfare committee. Because of their stake president’s vision, each ward and branch was challenged to assemble a spreadsheet that contained three columns. The first column listed the name of the family, the second column the assigned home teachers, and the third column the visiting teachers. Ward welfare committees were encouraged to have these spreadsheets in front of each committee member in every meeting so that discussions and decisions would include the resources of both home and visiting teachers. Do you see how having this information could help you share ideas to meet needs before assistance is necessary? Do you see how good information can help you be a proactive participant in council meetings? I hope you will begin to see welfare differently. I hope you will see beyond food orders and will leave being proactive. Every Relief Society in this Church has needs that can be addressed in advance. Visiting teaching can help us to be proactive. Six months ago we talked about visiting teaching as being the heart and soul of Relief Society. Why is it the heart and soul? Because visiting teaching helps us know our sisters, know their needs, and know the contributions they can make to the Lord’s storehouse so all will be blessed. We use that term—“the Lord’s storehouse”—but what does it mean? The concept of the storehouse and the Church Welfare Services emerged from revelations given to the Prophet Joseph Smith beginning in 1831, a year after the Church was organized. In Doctrine and Covenants section 42, Church members were directed to “remember the poor, and consecrate [their] properties for [the poor's] support.”11 The goods and money thus contributed were to be “kept in [the Lord's] storehouse, to administer to the poor and the needy”12 under the direction of the local presiding leader. We work under that same direction today. Can you imagine what would happen if a stake welfare committee meeting started with a question like this: “Where do we desire to grow with respect to welfare in our stake?” This midwestern stake that I spoke about a moment ago realized they hadn’t give enough emphasis to the chronic problems of underemployment and job search. They did their homework. They knew that 80% of their sisters were single. They also learned that 90% of the women in the stake worked outside the home. Underemployment was a huge issue not only for the sisters but also for the brothers. Their answer to the underemployment problem was to include computer literacy as one of their 2004 welfare goals. Sisters, you have heard me say this before, but do you see how good information makes for good inspiration? Part of that good information is knowing your stake president’s vision of welfare. I asked one stake Relief Society president what her stake president’s vision of welfare was. She said that she wasn’t sure she had ever heard him express it, but she did know of his deep concerns for the spiritual well-being and the employment of stake members. Sisters, what are the concerns of your priesthood leaders? When you know this, you will be in a better position to assist them in helping sisters and families come unto Christ. Ward Relief Society Leaders If you are a ward Relief Society leader, please stand. You are where the rubber hits the road. One of our senior sister missionaries who served in the London South Mission shared this tender story with me. I’ve never forgotten it. I hope you will feel something as I share it. I believe it expresses the great work of Relief Society leaders in making a difference in the lives of those they love and serve. “It was in January that my husband left all of us just a month after my sixth child was born. I thought he was going to Michigan to check out a job but he never came back. I pleaded for four years, hoping that he would reconsider, and instead he sent me divorce papers. “It was in August of that year, the day before my oldest son’s 14th birthday, that my young Relief Society president and my neighbor, who was my visiting teacher, came to see how I was getting along. We talked for a while until they sincerely asked me how I was. I broke down in tears because I wanted to do something for my son and I couldn’t even make him a birthday cake. They comforted me, then checked my cupboards and refrigerator and found them all totally empty. I had used all of my food storage in seven and a half months. I never received any money from my ex-husband, and my bills were behind because my savings were gone. The next day I had a bishop’s order, and my Relief Society president took me to the bishops’ storehouse, where she made sure I received all that I needed, including material to make a shirt for my son and ingredients for a cake. It was hard to accept help from the Church. When the bishop called my family to ask them to help me financially they couldn’t—they had no means to help me. The bishop asked me to work on the Church welfare farm. My older children and I did this during the growing season. “The bishop met with me every week to make sure I could meet my payments, and with his help we were able to work things out. I went to work at night to help as much as I could. The bishop encouraged me to go to school and get a higher education. I waited until my youngest child was three before consenting to do so. I received a full tuition grant, and in three and a half years I had my bachelor’s degree in elementary education.”13 The story doesn’t end here. This dear sister subsequently remarried and her six children and his eight children became a united family! After the death of her husband 17 years later, she chose to serve a mission, and she continues to serve. She is currently serving her fourth mission as a single sister. Sisters, do you see the circular miracle of the welfare plan? This sister and her children were receivers, but when her self-confidence and self-reliance were restored, she became and continues to be a giver. A devoted Relief Society president—that’s you, sisters—working with a bishop who understood his responsibility, and a receiver—our dear sister missionary—who was willing to work made this happen. Elder Glen L. Rudd, a former member of the First Quorum of the Seventy, has expressed, “The poor of the Church need leaders who are understanding and patient. Charity, the pure love of Christ, must be in the heart of every bishop and Relief Society president.”14 Charity is what Relief Society is all about. We work within the bonds of charity at every level. The handbook states that “members of the ward Relief Society presidency minister to sisters in the ward. . . . They seek out and assist sisters who are in need.”15 What does seek out mean? It’s not just assisting with the temporal needs of food, clothing, and shelter—it’s also seeking out those with spiritual needs. Welfare means both temporal and spiritual well-being. I hope you are seeking out those young adult women who are transitioning into Relief Society. Their talents and skills will make an important contribution to the Lord’s storehouse. I hope transition is a priority. Know your young adult sisters; include them, mentor them, be able to make an accounting to your priesthood leaders about them. Take care of their spiritual and temporal well-being. We are losing too many of them. They need Relief Society, and Relief Society needs them. I’m reminded of a ward Relief Society president who, when I asked her how things were going, replied, “We have a great ward. We don’t have any welfare needs.” I was struck by the relief in her voice! Sisters, every ward has welfare needs. I believe every person does too! At times in our lives we are all in want either spiritually or temporally. If you believe you live in a welfare-free zone, I ask you to look again! No ward is without welfare needs. Seek out those in spiritual need. An effective way to do this is to sit as a presidency in the front of the room during your Sunday meetings. I know as you observe the sisters in your ward you will receive inspiration about their spiritual and temporal well-being. I know of a Relief Society president who carries a roster in her purse, and when she has a minute she ponders the names of the sisters in her ward. I promise as you ponder and pray about your sisters that the Lord will help you discern both their spiritual and temporal needs. I’d like to say a few words about temporal needs. As ward Relief Society leaders you are in a great position to bless the lives of sisters and their families. Our fourth objective, “strengthen and protect families,”16 talks about provident living and wise home management. Are you teaching provident living and home management skills? I ask this question because as I recently visited with some young adult sisters, they mentioned the need for an Enrichment meeting on “the things my mother never taught me.” These young adult women wanted to know how to hem a skirt, make a casserole, and use a budget. I guess my question is, “Do their mothers know how to do this?” If they don’t, what can you do to provide opportunities for them to learn these skills and teach them to their daughters? In addition, have mothers in your wards and stakes who are preparing a daughter or son to serve a mission taught them how to sew on a button, mend a pair of pants, or wash their clothes? Home instruction in provident living will bless future missionaries. They will enter the mission field able to live within a budget and manage their living allowance and, hopefully, at the conclusion of their mission, be able to do as one wonderful elder in our mission did. He returned sacred funds he had saved through his provident living. I have such respect for him and for what he was taught in his home. In today’s world, debt is a terrible problem which robs families and individuals of self-reliance. We must model and teach living within our means. As our children were growing up, during dinner conversations, we tried to impress upon them the importance of earning interest rather than paying interest. We taught them that one way to get ahead is to earn money while they were sleeping. Interest was the way this happened. It is gratifying to see our sons and their wives teaching this to their children. Our son David told us that he took his seven-year-old daughter Ruby to the bank to put money in her savings account and explained that she would earn interest while she was sleeping. A few weeks later during family home evening, they were discussing how much money they would need to have for their family vacation. Ruby said she would help the family earn more money, and David asked her how she would do that. Ruby replied, “I will sleep more.” She understood the principle. Have you considered how the spiritual well-being of our sisters is impacted by their dress and grooming? Are there sisters in your wards who don’t feel the Spirit as often as they could because of how they dress? We know of one bishop who specifically asked that an Enrichment meeting be held for Relief Society sisters and the young women to address modesty. Some of the mothers were the most grievous offenders, and they were oblivious. In the general Young Women’s meeting, President Hinckley again emphasized the importance of modesty. We need to follow the counsel of our prophet. Listen to what he said: “Modesty in dress and manner will assist in protecting against temptation. It may be difficult to find modest clothing, but it can be found with enough effort. I sometimes wish every girl had access to a sewing machine and training in how to use it. She could then make her own attractive clothing. I suppose this is an unrealistic wish. But I do not hesitate to say that you can be attractive without being immodest.”17 What is the standard, sisters? Pose that question in your Relief Societies. How does modesty influence our welfare both spiritually and temporally? I hope we won’t overlook the power of home, family, and personal enrichment meetings to meet welfare needs—both spiritual and temporal. Self-Reliance The objective of welfare is to help us become spiritually and temporally self-reliant. Our temporal self-reliance increases as we discipline ourselves to gain an education, to live within our means, to strengthen our personal work ethic, and to share our abundance with others. We also have been given the responsibility to teach self-reliance in our own families. We can help our family develop temporal self-reliance as we teach provident living. Our children learn the way free agency works as we allow them progressive decision-making responsibility and to experience the consequences of good and bad choices. If we make every decision for them, we should not be surprised if they become adults who struggle with making good decisions. I can’t walk away from talking about temporal self-reliance without talking about work. When I was called as the Relief Society general president I said in general conference, “I do know how to work.”18 Work is a key to welfare. Sisters, we can’t be self-reliant if we don’t know how to work, and we have to teach our children to work. Teaching the importance, the joy, and the rewards of work is best done and modeled in the home. Again, we should not be surprised if a child who has every chore done for them develops into an adult without the capacity for or the love of work. I would like to end with a few thoughts on spiritual self-reliance. I believe that spiritual self-reliance comes as we learn to live and keep the law of the fast. In the Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, it reads: “Fasting, accompanied by prayer, is a form of worship. The Lord has commanded His people to fast to help them draw close to Him, overcome worldliness, gain spiritual strength, increase their compassion, and prepare themselves for service. Fasting is fundamental to our spiritual well-being and temporal welfare.”19 One of the most important ways Latter-day Saints can care for the needy is through fast offerings. Giving a generous fast offering blesses both the giver and the receiver. President Hinckley has said, “Think . . . of what would happen if the principles of fast day and the fast offering were observed throughout the world. The hungry would be fed, the naked clothed, the homeless sheltered. . . . The giver would not suffer but would be blessed by his small abstinence. A new measure of concern and unselfishness would grow in the hearts of people everywhere.”20 Sisters, are we personally living the law of the fast? Are we teaching it to our families? Are we testifying of its blessings? Do our sisters in our wards and stakes understand the importance of living this law? Teach the law of the fast in a first Sunday lesson. As a presidency, help your teachers find ways to teach this very important gospel principle. A proper fast includes abstaining from food and drink for two consecutive meals. It also includes prayerful preparation with a specific focus during the fast and attendance at fast and testimony meeting. Making a generous fast offering donation completes our fast. The fast offering is an important underpinning of the welfare program. It provides priesthood leaders with funds to purchase the goods and service which cannot be obtained through local storehouses and other resources. The prophet Isaiah teaches about the true law of the fast with its attendant blessings. As I read from Isaiah chapter 58 starting with verse 8, listen for the promises that come as we keep the law of the fast. “Then shall thy light break forth as the morning, and thine health shall spring forth speedily: and thy righteousness shall go before thee; the glory of the Lord shall be thy rereward. “Then shalt thou call, and the Lord shall answer; thou shalt cry, and he shall say, Here I am. If thou take away from the midst of thee the yoke, the putting forth of the finger, and speaking vanity; “And if thou draw out thy soul to the hungry, and satisfy the afflicted soul; then shall thy light rise in obscurity, and thy darkness be as the noonday: “And the Lord shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not.”21 Here are some of the promises I heard. Your “health shall spring forth speedily,” you can call upon the Lord and He will answer, your countenance will be as the “noonday” sun, “the Lord shall guide thee continually” and “make fat thy bones.” I don’t know—do you want fat bones? And then the phrase I love the most, “[You shall] be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not.” Sisters, why wouldn’t we want these blessings? They can be ours if we observe to keep the law of the fast. President Marion G. Romney gave this promise: “Be liberal in your giving, that you may grow yourselves. Don’t give just for the benefit of the poor, but give for your own welfare. Give enough so that you can give yourself into the kingdom of God through consecrating of your means and your time. Pay an honest tithing and double your fast offerings, if you want the blessings of heaven: I promise every one of you who will do it that you will increase your income. The Lord will reward you according to your deeds.”22 I testify of the blessings that come as you live the law of the fast. Sisters, thank you for lifting up the hands that hang down. Thank you for loving women and their families who need your tender care. As Relief Society leaders you are blessed with the privilege to serve and bless others, but please don’t forget yourself and your family. Are you applying welfare principles in your own life? Are you personally self-reliant, both spiritually and temporally? Do you make time for personal prayer and scripture study? For physical activity? You have to take care of yourself in order to care of your family. Know that you—and your family—are your first priority. In Mosiah 4:27 the Lord tells us, “It is not requisite that a man [or woman] should run faster he [or she] has strength.” I have confidence in you and I pray for you that you will know how to meet both the temporal and spiritual needs of the sisters and families you serve. As you are privileged to bless others, may you feel the love of the Lord in you life as you keep your covenants, exercise charity, and strengthen families. May God bless you in this great work—the work of Relief Society—is my prayer, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen. Endnotes 1. Personal correspondence. 2. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2: Priesthood and Auxiliary Leaders (1998), 194. 3. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 194. 4. Gordon B. Hinckley, “Standing Strong and Immovable,” Worldwide Leadership Training Meeting, Jan. 2004, 20–21. 5 Harold B. Lee, welfare agricultural meeting, Oct. 2, 1971. 6. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 195; emphasis added. 7. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 193. 8. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 195. 9. Personal correspondence. 10. Personal correspondence. 11. Doctrine and Covenants 42:30. 12. Doctrine and Covenants 42:34. 13. Personal correspondence. 14. Glen L. Rudd, Pure Religion: The Story of Church Welfare since 1930 (1995), 314. 15. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 196. 16. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 193. 17. "Stay on the High Road," Ensign, May 2004, 114. 18. In Conference Report, Apr. 2002, 99; or Ensign, May 2002, 84. 19. Church Handbook of Instructions, Book 2, 255–256. 20. In Conference Report, Apr. 1991, 73; or Ensign, May 1991, 52–53. 21. Isaiah 58:8–11. 22. Pure Religion, 377.