Sarah’s Trial

I’m 26, almost 27 …
all of my friends are married,
sisters have children
and the few I’m
compatible with
become fewer …
Now Sarai,
Abram’s wife, bare him no children.
if I
reordered my priorities …
And she had a handmaid,
an Egyptian,
whose name was Hagar.
And Sarai said
unto Abram,
Behold, now, the Lord
hath restrained me from bearing;
I pray thee go in
unto my maid;
it may be
that I may obtain children by her. …
and Sarah
saw the son of Hagar the Egyptian,
which Hagar had borne unto Abraham,
and she was troubled.
I know what the
blessed me with …
And God said unto Abraham,
as for Sarai thy wife,
thou shalt not call her name Sarai,
but Sarah thou shalt call her name.
And I will bless her,
And I will give thee a son of her;
yea, I will bless her,
and she shall be blessed,
The mother of nations;
kings and peoples shall be of her.
… with
and for
posterity, and the Temple …
And God said, Sarah thy wife
shall bear thee a son,
and thou shalt call his name Isaac;
and I will establish
my covenant with him also. …
and I want my children
raised, blessed, healed
by their father, a
covenanted patriarch … but
I want children! …
and I’m afraid
to wait
until I’m ninety … I don’t
believe … they
know what it’s like … asking
me to wait … and remain
single …
Sarah thy wife shall have a son.
And Sarah heard him,
in the tent door.
And now
Abraham and Sarah being old,
and stricken in age;
therefore it had ceased to be with Sarah
after the manner of women;
Sarah laughed within herself,
After I have waxed old shall I have pleasure,
my lord being old also?
but Bishop …
“I bless
you if you will trust
in the Lord, waiting
His due time …”
And the angel of the Lord
said unto Abraham,
Wherefore did Sarah laugh,
Shall I of a surety bear a child,
which am old?
perhaps he’s not
right with the Church, but …
I love him!
and Sarah laughed within herself
and her faith waned …
“but …”
Is anything too hard for the Lord
And Abraham was an hundred years old,
when his son Isaac was born
unto him.
And Sarah said,
God has made me to rejoice;
and also all that know me will rejoice with me.
And she said unto Abraham,
Who would have said that Sarah
should have given children suck?
For I was barren,
but the Lord promised,
and I have borne unto Abraham
a son in his old age.

(Scripture references from Inspired Version of the Bible, Genesis 16–21.) [JST, Gen. 16–21]