It started raining quite heavily during our branch picnic, and the canopy that had been erected to cover the picnic tables was fast filling with water. One of the brothers, a recent convert, decided to stand under the middle of the canopy and hold it up so that the rainwater would drain off. As I turned around and saw him standing there, I couldn’t help remarking, “I’m impressed, Brother Baker—a new convert and already you’ve been called to a stake position.”

Anne C. Rehn Spring Hill, Florida

The small ward choir was rehearsing the hymn “Master, The Tempest is Raging.” Basses droned on one pitch, tenors were non-existent, altos strove to find correct notes, sopranos quivered. Singing over the violence of the storm, the choir was struggling through the phrase “when each moment so madly is threatening a grave in the angry deep” when the choir director stopped, sighed, and said, “Brothers and sisters, we sound a little seasick.”

Joan Oviatt Barstow, California

During our Gospel Doctrine class we had a lesson on Exodus, chapters 13 to 18 [Ex. 13–18]. Part of the lesson dealt with the priesthood counsel Moses had received from his father-in-law, Jethro. One of the questions the manual asked was, “What are examples of some of our own opportunities to accept … counsel?”

Since the ward Relief Society president was in the class, I asked her if she had the opportunity to receive counsel and from whom. She gave an immediate and candid reply: “From everybody in town.”

Glen B. Nelson Fredonia, Arizona

Attempting to leave Temple Square from a general conference session, a bishop encountered heavily congested traffic, spiced with plenty of honking horns.

He was heard to remark that driving in this conference traffic must be a lot like Old Testament law: “A toot for a toot, and a fender for a fender.”

Gerald H. Curtis Phoenix, Arizona

The stake president, who was conducting, was giving his concluding remarks to the congregation. He had thanked the participants on a successful program, then noted how nice it was, since the new consolidated meeting schedule began, to see the husbands taking their small children to priesthood meeting.

“And there are even tables now in the men’s rest rooms for changing baby’s diapers,” he continued. “That’s progress!” Considerable laughter erupted from the audience, especially from approving mothers.

Then he looked at his program sheet and announced, “The closing hymn will be on page 206.” He was silent for a moment and then began to laugh. Soon everyone joined with him as they realized the hymn on page 206 was “The World Has Need of Willing Men.”

Edward Milo Millet Orem, Utah

One day, a few years ago, I was driving our four children to Primary in our small subcompact. At that time the oldest was almost five, the youngest was one, and I was expecting our fifth child. Our third child, crammed in the back seat, said, “I wish we had a car like Sister Cail’s.” (She had a station wagon.)

I asked, “Why?”

She quickly answered, “So we could have more children.”

Eileen Walker Fresno, California

One Sunday during sacrament meeting my sister-in-law noticed that her little five-year-old daughter, Nikki, was becoming quite nervous and intent during the closing hymn. The closer the ward clerk came to her row, the more earnest she became at trying to sing the words. As the clerk passed by to continue his count of attendance, she turned to her mother and said, “I don’t like that man!” When her mother asked why, she replied, “Every Sunday he comes down the aisle and watches to see if you’re not singing. Then he goes back to his seat and writes your name down, and that’s not fair because we little kids don’t know the words!”

Clarene Forster Delta, Utah

A few years ago, Windsor, Canada, was included in the Bloomfield Hills Michigan Stake. At a monthly leadership meeting, the stake president was conducting a ward by ward roll call and was asking the bishop of each ward to make an accounting of those brethren not in attendance.

When it came time for Windsor to make an accounting, several were absent. The bishop then told the stake president that they all had good excuses. Every one of them was “out of the country.”

Stan Allison Warren, Michigan

[illustration] Illustrated by Bigelow