1. Who can jump higher than the top of the kitchen table? Anybody can because the table top can’t jump.
2. What has a thousand needles but does not sew? A porcupine.
3. How can you place a pencil on the floor so that no one can jump over it? Place it next to the wall.
4. What day of the year is a command to go forward? March 4th.
5. Why did the poor mother flea look so sad? Because all her little fleas were going to the dogs.
6. Mr. Green is a butcher. He’s six feet tall and wears size 12 shoes. What does he weigh? Meat, of course.
7. Why is winter the best time to buy thermometers? Because in the summer they are a lot higher.
8. What won’t cry out if you strike it? A match.