When Illness Strikes

Brother and Sister Carson had twin daughters, sixteen years of age, and two sons, ages twelve and ten. Sister Carson was an expert homemaker. No one in the home could equal her efficiency. Brother Carson and his family depended heavily upon Sister Carson’s smooth manner of handling all matters dealing with the home.

One evening at a social gathering, Sister Carson suffered a stroke. She was paralyzed from the waist down and did not respond to treatment. She was very worried about what would happen to her home now that she could not do all that she had done. Her family seemed incapable of maintaining the order that she expected and this upset her and her family. The family did not seem to know where to find things, what to do, or how to do it.

Brother Carson mourned over the situation and seemed to spend longer hours at his work. He lacked resourcefulness in bringing hope, comfort, or encouragement into the home. The situation became more and more discouraging until the twins were sent to live with Brother Carson’s sister, and the boys found a home with Grandmother and Grandfather Carson. Brother Carson and his wife went to her mother’s to live.

After the family had gone, a neighbor made the following observation: “They were a happy family until trouble came. They did not know how to share responsibility. When the mother had her stroke, the family members did not know how to help and comfort one another.”

The Fosters had five children ranging in age from six to fifteen. They were a happy family and enjoyed doing things together. Each had his own responsibility in the home, and even Susan, age six, was expected to do her part.

One afternoon while driving home from shopping, Sister Foster was involved in an automobile accident. She was seriously injured and lost the use of both legs.

It was a tragic circumstance, but Brother Foster and his five children gathered in prayer and sought the comforting influence of the Lord. They put their arms around each other and began to make plans. Brother Foster told his family, “Mother can’t walk. The doctors say she may never use her legs again. We have depended on her for our meals, washing, and ironing, but now things have changed. We will each need to do some of the things she used to do. What do you suggest?”

Denton, the oldest son, said, “I’ll come home from school as early as I can. I know how to wash clothes.”

Joyce, almost fourteen, quickly added, “I’ll do the cooking.”

Each member of the family told what he would do. Little Susan promised to help keep things off the floor and in their place. Donald and Jane mentioned other things that they could do. The Foster family found comfort in the Lord through their prayers and also in each other. They made plans and took over most of Sister Foster’s duties. Despite the unfortunate accident, they were still a happy family.

• Why was the Foster family better able to adjust to their new situation?

Now bring the sack filled with books or other heavy objects into the room. Have each family member take a turn trying to lift the sack and carry it.

• Can you carry the contents of this sack easily?

Remove the books or objects from the sack, and divide them among the family members. Give each member only as many as he or she is able to carry easily.

• Can you carry the contents of this sack easily now?

Explain to your family that when the responsibility of caring for a sick or disabled member of the family is placed upon only one member of the family, the burden of that responsibility becomes very heavy, just as the sack became very heavy for only one of them to carry.

Explain that when that same burden of responsibility is divided and shared among all the members in the family, it becomes lighter and is easy to carry, just as the contents of the sack were easy to carry when they were divided and shared.

Have a family member read Galatians 6:2 and explain what the scripture means to him.

• Are we, as members of this family, ready to share one another’s burdens?

When Michael was ten years old he was in an automobile accident. His legs were crushed so badly that the doctors told Michael he would probably never walk again. Michael didn’t believe them, however. His dad had given him a priesthood blessing. He remembered the words: “Your weakness will become a great strength if you have faith in Jesus Christ.”

How could his weakness become a strength unless he could walk and run again? Then maybe he would become a great runner or even a football hero. He pictured himself running to the winning touchdown with the fans going wild! Yes, he knew he would walk again because he did have faith in the Lord. He was brave through all the operations and pain, and he tried to be cheerful. He prayed every day. He knew he would walk again.

Michael soon made friends with the other children in the hospital. In fact, they called him “Mr. Friendly” because he was so happy and tried to make everyone else happy, too. That made Michael feel good because he wanted to help. He knew that all the children didn’t have the special blessing that he did to keep his spirits up. He especially felt a love for the babies. They were so little and helpless. He loved to make them smile and laugh. Pretty soon even the smallest baby would grin just to see him coming.

Then one day, one of Michael’s legs hurt even worse than usual. After the doctors examined his leg, they told him that it was getting worse and not better and that they would have to take it off.

“Take my leg off!” Michael thought. “If they did that, then how could I become a great football star? They just can’t do it!”

But they had to do it to save Michael’s life. When it was all over, Michael felt sad and confused. How could his weakness become a great strength now? But Michael didn’t quit having faith. He still loved the Lord, and he knew that the Lord loved him. He kept praying, and he tried to be good. He knew that the Lord could perform mighty miracles, and so he would just have to wait.

Meanwhile, as he began to feel better, he spent more and more time trying to keep all of the other children happy. He told them about Jesus and our Heavenly Father and helped them learn to pray. He didn’t have time to be too sad or to think about football anymore. He began, instead, to pretend that he was a great doctor that helped little children get well.

Finally, after many months in the hospital, Michael was ready to go home. It was an exciting day but a sad one too as he said good-bye to each of his friends. When he said good-bye to the babies, he almost didn’t want to go. He said a special prayer in his heart for each one of them. When his doctor came to say good-bye, he ruffled Michael’s hair and said, “Well, Mr. Friendly, you have been a great strength to all the children in the hospital—a very great strength.” And then another voice echoed in Michael’s mind, “A great strength—your weakness will become a great strength.”

Suddenly Michael knew how his prayers were being answered, and he also knew that he would never run again.

After you discuss the story of Michael and the implications it may have in your family, conclude by having a family member read Elder Marion D. Hanks’ counsel:

“In your own life realize there will come troubles. God bless you not to be negative or fatalistic in your thinking but to treat trouble as a friend and raise foundations that will permit you to stand steady.

“God does love us and He takes no delight in our sorrows and failures.” (“Use Gift of Time,” Church News, 24 Apr. 1965, p. 6.)