(Click.) “Dad! No! This show is so corny!”

(Click. Click. Click. Click.) “No … Dumb … Stupid … Nah …”

“Hey! Why’d you turn it off?!”

“Elder, would you please stop singing ‘High on the Mountain Top’!”

“No, really. I meant it as a compliment when I called you an ‘eight-cow wife!’ ”

“It’s been over 30 years since you learned math. How do you know things haven’t changed since then?”