“I am repenting of a sin, but other people gossip about me. It hurts a lot. What do I do?”10751_000_021
If you’ve done all you can to repent of your mistake and people still gossip about you, don’t make it harder on yourself by getting upset. Quietly show others that their gossip is wrong by the way you live.
Talking privately with close friends to share how you feel can be an opportunity to explain repentance and the Atonement. You can also explain that because you regret what you did, you really are trying to change. The Atonement makes it possible for Jesus Christ to forgive you and help you be better. If the people who are important to you understand, they will support you through difficult times and can help you when they hear others gossip.
Don’t let another’s judgment keep you from making the changes you want to make or from letting yourself be happy right now. Pray for comfort and know that Heavenly Father is pleased with you for repenting. His opinion matters most.
Turn to Your Parents
I have also had to repent. Before I repented, my friends all knew what was going on, and I felt like I was letting everyone down. My family relationships were bad too. It helped to talk to my parents. They were upset, but they supported my decision to change. I lost a lot of friends, but the ones I have now love me even though I made some bad choices. It helps to pray to Heavenly Father. He knew what I was going through and helped me through the trial. He will help anyone who asks for help.
Allisyn G., 16, Utah, USA
Pray for Peace
No matter what you do, you can’t control what other people say about you. What you can do is decide how you react. If you act like it doesn’t bother you, then maybe they will stop. Eventually the people gossiping about you may forget that it even happened. Pray to Heavenly Father to help you feel peace when you hear their comments and to not let them bother you. No matter what they say about you, remember that you are doing what Heavenly Father wants you to. Whatever they say, this will not change.
Dallas C., 17, Nova Scotia, Canada
Pray for Guidance
I’ve been in a situation like this before, and it really hurts. But then I chose to do the right thing. I prayed for Heavenly Father’s guidance. I talked to the people who gossiped and explained how regretful I am for my wrongdoings and that they should learn from them instead of gossiping, for that will bring no good.
Mayla A., 18, Camarines Norte, Philippines
Don’t think any less of yourself because of the comments. God knows you have the strength to endure the ridicule and move forward to better things. Now all you have to do is be the person Heavenly Father knows you can be, and then rising above this trial will become easier.
Lacey J., 15, Nebraska, USA
Keep Moving Forward
You should persevere and finish repenting because even if other people gossip, it is still more important to repent. If these people are your friends, they will respect you for persevering.
Ethan D., 15, Ohio, USA
Remember Forgiveness Is Real
Just try to remember one thing: the Lord has forgiven you. The people gossiping about you may not have realized that once you have repented, God will remember your sins no more (see D&C 58:42). Even though those around you may remember what you did wrong, your Father in Heaven does not.
Joey S., 15, Virginia, USA
Listen to Your True Friends
One thing you should do is ignore the gossip said about you. If it’s from people in school, then spend more time with friends who don’t gossip about you. Your friends can help you forget about anything people are saying.
Jarom S., 14, Arizona, USA
Pray for Those Who Hurt You
When you pray to the Lord as part of your repentance, take extra time to pray for those who gossip about you. Ask Heavenly Father to soften their hearts, and ask for strength to overcome the gossip.
Mary Jo T., 18, Ohio, USA
Responses are intended for help and perspective, not as official pronouncements of Church doctrine.
Repentance Brings Peace and Happiness
“Repentance always means that there is greater happiness ahead. I bear witness that our Savior can deliver us from our sins. … I testify that His divine gift removes guilt from our heart and brings peace to our conscience.”
Elder Neil L. Andersen of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, “‘Repent … That I May Heal You,’” Ensign, Nov. 2009, 42–43.
Sometimes I feel bored at church. What can I do to enjoy going to church more?
Send your answer and photo by December 15, 2013.
Go to newera.lds.org and click “Submit Your Work.”
You can also write to us at email@example.com or
Responses may be edited for length or clarity.