1971
Should a girl worry about not getting married?
June 1971


“Should a girl worry about not getting married?” New Era, June 1971, 45

“Should a girl worry about not getting married?”

Answer/Alberta H. Christensen

No. Worry does not solve a problem nor is it even an enjoyable activity.

It is normal for a Latter-day Saint girl who knows that marriage and motherhood are ordained of God and that the family unit may continue throughout eternity to look hopefully toward a happy marriage in this life. She should continue to do this. She should, however, keep in mind that marriage age patterns differ widely from country to country and culture to culture, even from family to family. Thus, no specific chronological age for marriage could be given that would have universal application.

In American culture, for example, there are unnumbered individuals who marry in their late teens yet mature into wise and happy marriage partners. Conversely, numerous late-in-life marriages are exceptionally happy and will be eternally rewarding. The marriage ceremony itself does not guarantee happiness and personal fulfillment. Divorce court records confirm this statement.

Every girl should be continuously engaged in constructive activities that will prepare her to be a happy and valuable person. This will be the result of living in harmony with gospel teachings and ideals. If possible, she should acquire specific vocational training, including homemaking skills. Where possible, she should engage in activities that give her opportunities to make new friends and to meet eligible and desirable men.

She should learn that the truly happy woman is one who considers life an enriching experience and who knows the joy of unselfish service to others.

The single girl should not be unduly concerned about her age, but very much concerned about the quality of her personal life.

From our church leaders comes this counsel:

“… You good sisters, who are single and alone, do not fear that blessings are going to be withheld from you. You are not under any obligation or necessity of accepting some proposal that comes to you which is distasteful for fear you will come under condemnation. If in your hearts you feel that the gospel is true and would under proper conditions receive these ordinances and sealing blessings in the temple of the Lord, and that is your faith and your hope and your desire, and that does not come to you now, the Lord will make it up, and you shall be blessed, for no blessing shall be withheld. …” (Joseph Fielding Smith, Elijah the Prophet and His Mission [Deseret Book Co., 1957], p. 51.)

“You young women advancing in years who have not yet accepted a proposal of marriage, if you make yourselves worthy and ready to go to the House of the Lord and have faith in this sacred principle, even though the privilege of marriage does not come to you now, the Lord will reward you in due time and no blessing will be denied you. You are not under obligation to accept a proposal from some one unworthy of you for fear you will fail of your blessings.” (Harold B. Lee, Youth and the Church [Deseret Book Co., 1955], p. 132.)

  • member of the Relief Society general board